Day 134

“I intreated thy favour with my whole heart: be merciful unto me according to thy word.”  Psalms 119:58

Have you ever needed, really needed, a favor?

Do you remember the feeling of desperation and anxiety that came over you as you sought out someone to help you?

This past year Mark was invited to perform a wedding for one of our young couples in our church.  Brazilian weddings can get VERY fancy as those in attendance are usually dressed in formal wear.  Amelia and I went on a hunt to rent formal dresses to wear to the wedding but found they were going to cost an arm and a leg.  My friend told me about a store where she had found hers and that the lady there would work with me on a price, so off we went with high hopes of something appropriate and CHEAP.

I am not a fashionista, nor do I care about what colors or styles are in season, so I told the store owner that I would try on anything that would fit.  I also am not fancy, and the last formal dress I had tried on was at my own wedding over 24 years ago as well as a few pounds ago, know what I am saying?  So I found myself struggling in the fitting room as I tried on dress after dress.  At one point I got stuck in one particular burgundy number and began sweating as I tried to twist first one way and then another to free my arms from the lacy sleeves that seemed to have permanently attached themselves to my damp skin.

The sales lady kept asking me if I needed assistance, but I was so embarrassed at how awful my fat self would look to her that I lifted my mouth to an opening in the fabric and told her I was just fine.  Clearly, I was lying and eventually my claustrophobia got the best of me as I feared I would be strangled to death by the dress.  I was desperate to be freed from the tangled mess of silk and lace and it is a wonder I didn’t fall sideways into the dressing room curtain and out into the store for all to see.

My life can sometimes get in situations that “strangle”me and attempt to hold me captive like that silly formal gown.  I can only fake it for so long and pretend that I am okay.  Usually, in my selfish pride, I end up making the situation much, much worse until I become so desperate of falling down that I cry out to God and implore Him for supernatural help.

The psalmist is saying that he has implored and sought God’s face and he doesn’t want anything more than what God has already promised in His Word. He just needs Him to hear and answer.

My mom often tells me when I am in a mess that I need to get in God’s face through prayer.  She means for me to be serious, not divide my affections or have a half in, half out, disposition to my pleas.  And she couldn’t be more correct.  God wants my faith, nothing wavering.

“But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed. For let not that man think that he shall receive any thing of the Lord.”  James 1:6-7

Mama made my sister and I memorize these verses when we were young and she would make a grand show out of the words “driven with the wind and tossed”.  I guarantee you Stephanie and I have never forgotten this passage.  We learned that God will make good on His promises, but we need to rely on Him in faith, not our own abilities.

Every time I get in a tangled mess, I have to remind myself to quit struggling on my own. I admit personal defeat and humble myself at His feet and implore with my WHOLE heart for help.

And He always is ready to rescue me.  I wish I didn’t need rescuing as much as I do, and I sure am thankful that His mercies are new each day and available for me to use.

Are you struggling?  Are you in need?  Stop.  Quit using your own force and your own strength.  Call on Him.  Get in God’s face and implore Him for help.

Untill Next Time, Lord willing,


One thought on “Day 134

  1. Sharon Loyd

    Your Dad just used that verse with “driven with the wind and tossed” and I thought about you and Stephanie. I looked down the row to see if I could catch Stephanie’s eye and she looked right at me. We both almost burst with laughter but I’m glad we didn’t. Your Dad would have been embarrassed. It is good to make motions with scripture like we used to, cause it keeps it in the mind.


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